10 Minutes for You: Self-Care for Parents

Starting Small

Busy parents often make the mistake of caring for everyone else, neglecting their own physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual health. Our culture rewards productivity and “pushing through,” which doesn’t help. Parents in my office feel guilty about spending even an hour on their own health. I used to be that person, too. What I’ve learned is that, just like riding a bicycle, starting small helps. You might ride a few yards and fall down, but eventually you can ride for an hour!

Reducing Guilt and Building Courage

Years ago, 10 minutes to myself sounded ridiculous. How could 10 minutes possibly help? Again, just like riding a bike, you have to start somewhere.

Those of us who resist self-care or even roll our eyes at the suggestion must start small. At first it feels foreign and self-indulgent. We feel slightly uncomfortable.

I’ll tell you a secret. Taking care of ourselves 10 minutes at a time eventually decreases the misplaced guilt and we find ourselves enjoying the time. You may even start to crave it, as you realize it nourishes you and brings you more energy for those you love. Over time, those small steps will increase your courage to make bigger changes in your routines, your lifestyle, and your thinking.

You’ll realize you’re more than your productivity. As a client said to me recently, “I realized I miss myself.”

10-Minute Self-Care Activities

Now that you’re convinced (I hope!), you may not know where to start. Often my clients don’t remember what makes them happy, energized, or peaceful. Try these ideas and see what happens. Do you notice your breath and heart rate slowing down? Do you find yourself smiling? Do you feel creative? Do your thoughts change from negative to positive or hurried to slow? Just notice.

1. Take a drive.
2. Take a walk without your phone.
3. Take a walk with your phone and photograph lovely things. I recommend turning off your notifications.
4. Ride a bike.
5. Stretch.
6. Sit or stand barefoot in the grass.
7. Listen to nature. Step outside and pay attention to what you hear.
8. Lie down.
9. Hide in your closet.
10. Make a list of what you can delegate to others.
11. Listen to music that makes you happy.
12. Listen to music that relaxes you.
13. Dance.
14. Do or watch something that makes you laugh.
15. Take a shower or bath.
16. Draw. Doodle. Color.
17. Do a “brain dump” and write everything you’re thinking.
18. Chop vegetables. (The rhythmic motion can feel great! Bonus: You can get out aggression.)
19. Read 1 chapter of a book.
20. Read a poem.
21. Do a jigsaw puzzle.
22. Slowly savor a cup of tea / coffee / hot chocolate.
23. Practice something you want to learn. (Needlework, calligraphy, photography, painting, gardening, skateboarding, coding, bread-making… whatever your heart desires! Perfection is not the goal.)

I encourage you to try at least one activity that raises your eyebrow in skepticism, because you may be surprised about how it makes you feel. Leave a comment or send me a message to let me now how it goes.